Black lesbians dating

I met my ex in the stone age of Yahoo personals. Back then there were quite a few black lesbians on the site. Interestingly enough, most of the faces I saw on those Yahoo profile pics ended up becoming great friends of mine in the black queer community. Much of the 21 to 30 year old crowd then transitioned from Yahoo to Downelink.

That site had a HUGE black community. But it quickly devolved into a hookup site as more people started posting pictures and messages that would never meet the community standards of traditional dating sites. After my ex and I broke up, I decided to take on OKCupid because the amount of single women in my immediate circle was quickly dwindling. I even rebooted my OKC profile, changed my pic I cut my dreadlocs off in and I thought it was deceiving to still have that picture up and headed off into the world of dating algorithms.

I met up with a hang gliding white lesbian once to see if there could actually be some sort of connection. The only thing we connected with was a love for Thai food and cognac which can work in certain situations. But there was no spark. And that is ok. Hell, at least I tried. So my friend suggested I try Dattch.

The pool on Dattch was even shallower. It was a terrible experience and made me start questioning my dating viability as a whole. All of this puts me back at the beginning of my quest for this elusive black lesbian waiting for me in cyberspace. So where in cyberspace are the black lesbians hooking up? I spoke to a friend recently who gave me a little context on our black community. This is something that, as a whole, many African-Americans have a hard time doing. Even while writing this article, I have a hard time saying it, admitting that I need help in the love department.

Dating requires a certain amount of vulnerability. To me it connects to this quote from psychologist Regina Romero: Society expects the African American to handle losses, traumas, failed relationships and the dual oppressions of racism and sexism. Falling short of this expectation is viewed by many African American women as a personal failure. Working within the ideologies that MHP and Dr. Romero have presented, it would seem that black women would avoid spaces like OKC for a few reasons.

The feeling that that putting ourselves out there is openly stating that we have somehow failed at connecting with a partner in more traditional real life settings. This feeling of failure, especially in the area of relationships, adds another dimension to how Black women navigate the dating world in this very public space. Which leads me to my next question: Are Black lesbians not interested in online dating in these spaces or is there something in the dating algorithm that keeps us apart?

I have friends on Facebook and Twitter that post all the time about their adventures in online dating. These are friends that live fairly closely to me and we have tons of things in common. Literally I cannot tell you what is on their profiles because I have never come across them.

These questions could make their matches a little more accurate. Is it wrong to have the desire to date women like yourself? We all have preferences and I happen to truly love Black lesbians. To ALWAYS be the black person in the room explaining the space we inhabit where we have to shift and make room and adjust to life and things that happen to us.

I want us to share a common ground and for me culture is a very important part of that foundation. I need you to have a firm stance on which Lionel from The Jeffersons was the best. You must have a particular fondness for The Wiz. Your shock that the Wayans made movies before Scary Movie does not win points.

Apparently someone else has been having the same experience that I have!


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Total 3 comments.
#1 22.08.2018 в 20:49 Smooth-Adam:
Fur-trees, for those who take a note

#2 31.08.2018 в 17:14 Serozzney:
In the mouth my feet, the right job

#3 31.08.2018 в 21:14 Xxqupidxx:
Complex texts are promising, I will put the site in bookmarks.